It’s impossible to get through life emotionally unscathed. We’ve all been hurt at some time or another – and not just by enemies. Even those close to us, like a teacher, coach, parent, friend, or partner, can inflict pain that leaves lasting feelings of anger and bitterness. But if we stay stuck in these feelings, we may be the ones who pay most dearly. Focusing on anger and bitterness can prevent us from enjoying what’s good in the present and can often lead to feelings of depression, anxiety, and meaninglessness in life.

The answer to stuckness is forgiveness.

Forgiveness is a process that includes several steps and can take months, even years – and it begins with the conscious choice to change. But making the choice to forgive may not come easily. After being badly hurt, it’s natural to have fantasies of revenge. And when someone you love has betrayed you in a fundamental way, for example by having a long-term affair, the road to forgiveness can be especially difficult.

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